Frequently Asked Questions
Workshop FAQ
Common questions not answered elsewhere. Logistical FAQ below
This workshop is about intimacy, communication, and sex. It might be more about one than the other. It depends on how you participate. It’s about your willingness to open up to yourself and other participants, to trust, to have faith and explore deeper dimensions of yourself and allow others to witness your more authentic self.
There are some similarities and many differences. We may have guided group exercises that may involve touch and expanding your physical comfort zone. We rely on and encourage the specific group dynamic to help shape the container. It’s less instructional and more crafted by our common energy and the intimacy we build with one another.
Through an intensive and concentrated series of processes, predominantly facilitated Heart Circles, we form a container where our authentic selves can emerge. We see it in others and others see it in us. We move together within the container to new levels of intimacy. We explore these new levels of physical and emotional intimacy together as a group.
Every day will have time allocated to sitting in a facilitated heart circle and working with the other participants to create a “sacred space” and, when all are ready, move towards creating common rituals within that space. There will be free time for shared cooking and cleaning, hikes, swimming, sunning, reading and maybe a little excursion or two. The focus of the workshop is on the Heart Circle, where we will reveal ourselves to one another.
A little hard to explain, but it’s the time when the circle achieves a level of comfort and trust with each other to begin the deeper exploration of intimacy. Wonderful things happen in ritual space.
Yes, no and maybe. We try to create a magical container where sex is one element of the energy exchanged. It may be more sensual than sexual or it may be very hot. It depends on the group. The potential is there. Consent is mandatory and explicit.
We agree to respect individual boundaries. We do ask everyone to commit to the process. No one is coerced, pressured, or forced to do anything they don’t want to do. Again, consent is mandatory and explicit.
Subject–SUBJECT consciousness is a concept articulated by Harry Hay, representing the valuable mindset in same-sex relationships, emerging from the inherent similarities of the partners.
The notion stands in contrast to the subject–object dynamic prevailing in heterosexual society, where men presume cultural dominance and see only themselves as subjects relative to women, who are in turn treated as objects or property. Hay extrapolated this interpersonal/sexual dynamic into a broader social context, believing that subject–object relationships were the root of society’s ills. Objectification served as a barrier, emotionally separating an individual self from another individual by dehumanizing them.
Same-sex relationships, however, suggest a different dynamic at work. Hay believed that gay relationships evolve from mutual respect and empathy for the other: a longing for a companion who is as equally valuable as the self, an interpersonal/sexual dynamic based on “subject–SUBJECT” consciousness. (Hay capitalized the second term for emphasis in all writings on the topic.) Hay believed that this subject–SUBJECT way of viewing the world is the most valuable contribution LGBT people bring to society at large: by empathizing with all people, relating to each other as equal-to-equal, society can change drastically, and social justice can prevail.
-From Wikipedia, emphasis added
Yes. We ask participants to commit to the entire 7-day workshop. To leave early or come late disrupts the communal energy and flow not to mention short changes you of the full experience. The workshop is not a gathering.
Most of our workshops are open to faggot and bi identified men which includes trans men. We don’t ask participants about their gender identity and may only ask whether they identify as gay, bi or faggot men.
The Full Spectrum Workshop is specifically not limited to any gender or sexuality. There is a calling for this work from and for all members of our Faerie community. This workshop is open to all Queer and/or Faerie identified people. Read more about this in the Full Spectrum Sex Magick call page here.
Logistics FAQs
Common questions not answered elsewhere.
Faerie Sex Magick is a 7-day workshop. We try to run from Saturday to Saturday depending on venue availability and other factors. We ask participants to arrive in time to be set up and ready to start the workshop at dinner on the first day. The workshop ends with the mid-day meal on the last day.
Depending on the venue, participants may arrive a day or more early and may choose to stay the night the workshop ends to enjoy each other’s company and to move toward integrating the week. Check with your facilitators to see what’s allowed as it varies by venue.
The workshops take place in 8 countries, primarily at Radical Faerie Sanctuaries, or compatible private land. Check out our Venues page to learn more.
We choose locations that we will have visual privacy so that we can be naked if we want to and so that rituals and ceremonies remain private.
The cost for the seven days is USD$550-850, CAD $650-1,000 for North America workshops, and includes food and tent camping. The cost for the workshop in Europe is €250-800. In Australia/NZ, the cost is AUD or NZD $800-1,000.
Some venues offer indoor accommodations which are available for some depending on need, and tent camping is available at all of the locations. No matter where you are you’ll be in a space full of emotionally present men. Our long standing Faerie policy: No One Will Be Turned Away for Lack of Funds (NOTAFLOF) applies to all of our workshops.
No One Turned Away for Lack of Funds (NOTAFLOF) is a long-held faerie philosophy that puts participation above money. It recognizes that we all have different abilities. The collective that runs the workshop believes strongly that money should not be a barrier to participating in the workshop.
If considering paying a small amount, we encourage participants to consider the amount you would spend on food for the week and contribute that amount to the workshop if possible.
The accommodations vary by venue. Most of the time most of us are in tents. If indoor space is available, it’s allocated based on need. If you are traveling far or in a manner that limits luggage, ask the facilitators if there is camping equipment you can borrow for the duration of the workshop.
We buy good quality, ideally organic, food and prepare delicious vegan/vegetarian meals. We sometimes have meat too, but always have vegan/vegetarian options and strive to meet everyone’s dietary requirements. We prepare our own breakfasts from the food in the kitchen. Lunch and dinner are generally prepared by volunteer faerie(s) who have done the workshop (but who are not part of the current workshop). Participants help the chefs with food prep and do all of the dishes and kitchen cleanup.
If you have specific dietary needs, please include those in the comments in the registration form. Food is always healthy and plentiful!
Want to Know More?
If you have questions after reading the FAQs and other part of the site, let us a know. [We are volunteers, so give us time to reply.]